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Rethinking Success?

Should We Rethink Success?

Do grades matter?

Parents encourage their children to excel at school and sometimes academic success is defined by getting all A’s.  After all, A’s are THE hallmark of academic excellence.  Right?  

Well no – not really.  Once you dig a little deeper, you find that grades reflect many factors – only one is learning.  

Family Context

For example, grades on homework, assignments and tests might reflect student and family context rather than learning when:

·      Students have robust parental or tutoring support with homework or studying.

·      Families have resources to access extra academic classes (math, writing, etc.).

·      Students have significant outside responsibilities, for example, working to support their families or watching younger siblings while a parent works.

Differences in student context bring up uncomfortable questions about grading.  After all, who is a better student?  The one who completes their work with support from an adult and gets an A?  Or the one who completes their work without an adult, while regularly caring for siblings and gets a B?

Grades and Mental Health

Did you know that while some parent engagement in school is good, too much has the potential to cause harm?  There appears to be an “inflection point” in parenting (Li et al, 2015).  Too much academic pressure (including but not limited to grades) increases negative student behaviors from substance abuse to self-harm, to petty crime and more.  Ironically, some students who feel this pressure also learn less.  What can a parent do?

A Healthy Approach to Grades

Should you just throw up your hands and adopt an anything goes position?  Of course not.  Grades are part of our system.  Happily, you can help your child develop a healthy relationship with grades.  Here are four tips to get you started:

1.    Distinguish between grades and learning.  Share that you want them to do their best and focus on deeply learning the material - not on what grade they receive.

2.    Discuss ranges of grades, for example, encouraging A’s and B’s.  Reaffirm (often!) that they will still do well in life - even if they get a lower grade.

3.    When they get an unexpected grade, ask them to analyze what they don’t understand.  Encourage them to advocate, not for their grade, but for their learning.   

4.    Remind your child that sometimes homework, assignments and tests just don’t go well.  This is a normal part of the human experience and doesn’t matter in the long term.  Then share a time *you* failed a test or forgot homework! 

In addition to these suggestions, it’s good practice to prioritize sleep and spending time with family over a focus on grades…both are linked to happier and healthier children.  A good night’s sleep enhances better learning, test-taking and mood.

Li, A., Obach, H., Cheng, S. (2015) . American Sociological Association Annual Meeting, 20 August. Chicago: American Sociological Association

 

Karen Shannon